My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
