i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I have fence marks all over my body
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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