well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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