im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
