his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
