I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
She even gives head with a lisp.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
