im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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