You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Walk of Shame today included voting.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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