My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
