No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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