is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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