I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
