Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize