apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
We smell like vodka and hangover
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
