so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize