i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
