i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I think my vagina is haunted
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
