I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
