the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
