Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
where are my eyebrows?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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