I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize