she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
