'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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