My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
