Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
