he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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