My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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