i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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