they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
