honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
