There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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