Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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