This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize