I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
why do cheetos always look like penises
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize