So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
