Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
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