two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I stole a fireplace last night.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
