Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
