ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
