You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
he thought i was a dude.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
