Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
