One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
there was a trapeze. enough said
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I just had sex on a roof
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
