wat bout pragnant strippers??
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
