those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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