you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
