Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
