the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
