i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
