I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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