I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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