You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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